Well, it's been another full day of waiting.
Still no word. Not even a "we're working on it." Nothing.
But today I have had peace. Peace about whatever is to come. I really do believe that God's perfect plan for both our family and the baby is going to reign over this situation. I find reassurance in that.
But being the planner and preparer that I am, I am still completely out of my element.
In all honesty, we're not exactly physically ready for a baby. (If we get one tomorrow, we'll be fine. I promise.) There are just things that I would like to do that we have't done yet. For example:
I'd like to paint the guest bedroom that is soon to be the baby's room, and buy a crib and any other furniture that we need. We haven't done that yet.
We have Luke's crib still in his room, but it's soon to be his big boy bed. We just have to convert it with the rails that Brian picked up last week.
I would also like to move the bed we use as a guest bed into the playroom, and completely re-arrange that room. It's a mess right now. I need it to be multifunctional.
Oh, and the closet in the guest bedroom needs to be completely cleaned out! Maybe that's tomorrow's project. That would make me feel much better.
See, there are all these things that I want to do and that need to be done, but I'm not bringing them to the top of the to-do list for some reason. Maybe it's doubt. Maybe it's fear.
I'm not sure what it is.
That is the part that makes me the most crazy about waiting around for someone to hand me a baby. We're not really ready (in my standards of readiness anyways).
I am keeping myself busy going from one project in my house to the next though, and that makes it a little easier.
I don't know if every day we wait will get easier or just more frustrating. Probably frustrating. It's been two full days now with no word from the case worker. I guess you could call that typical.
I did find out that we are being considered as placement for another little guy who is currently in emergency care (in a home that is fantastic). That too would be a great placement for our family. We are waiting on the Lord and His perfect timing in all of this.
I'm still worn out thinking about one more pair of socks to put on and one more little nose to wipe, but I'm ready for that. I'm ready for the change that it's going to create in our family. I know it won't be easy, but I know it will be worth it.
So tonight with all that said, I'm resting on these words:
"Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him." Psalm 37:7
.....day 111 of a year of writing....