Because We Can't Do It On Our Own

Thursday, March 1, 2012


So, just in case you were starting to believe that I have it all together, let me tell you a little story called "yesterday" so we can clear the air about any of us having it all together or thinking we do this thing called life on our own.

Yesterday, if you were to ask me how things were going, I would probably tell you that I was desperately searching for a plane ticket to Mexico so I could sit on the beach and say the words, "uno mas cerveza por favor." It was just that kind of day.

By 6:00 p.m., I was ready to throw in the towel. Seriously. Wednesdays are always hard for me since Brian is gone all day until late in the night. So, by bath time, I was past my tolerance level for all things toddler.

It's hard enough having two of my own, but throw in someone else's toddlers, and there are many days that are nothing short of hard, exhausting, and overwhelming.

During our pre-service training for becoming foster parents, they told us this story of a woman sitting on a bench outside of Wal-mart telling her caseworker over the phone to "Come get these kids now! I'm not leaving this bench until someone comes and picks them up!"

And we laughed when we heard that, but sadly, it's a true story.

I will admit that I have had those moments. They have been few and far between, but there have definitely been times when I have doubted if I was cut out for this.

The truth is, I'm not cut out for it. Not on my own. Not even close. On my own I'm angry, self-centered, short-tempered, irritable, selfish, annoyed, and exhausted.

Thank God I'm not doing this on my own.

It's days like yesterday that bring me to my knees before the Lord to say, I need You now more than ever! I need You, and I need You in a real way. I need the things You say I have through Christ, like love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. 

There are too many days when I don't see those things in me.

Last night when everyone was in the bath, and I was obviously frustrated, Addison, my four year old said to me, "Mommy, it's okay. When the babies' momma is better and not sick anymore, and they go home, it will just be me and Luke and it will be easier."

From the mouth of babes like a knife of truth to the heart. How do they always speak the truth? It's absolutely true. Life will be easier, but I wish there were more days when I lived with joy and peace in the midst of the trial. I know that He allows me to be broken so I will seek Him, and I'm so grateful that He does. I'm so grateful that the Lord never allows me to think for too long that "I've got this."

I don't. I don't have this. I never will....not without Him anyway.

So another day of time tracking begins and I'm cursing myself for thinking we should do this for seven whole days, but I'm also still learning things about the way I spend my time even as we go into day five of time tracking.

I hope you're still being challenged. I hope you are still going strong with the one thing you added to your schedule for the entire week and the one thing you decided to give up (a time waster). I'm finding it harder than it should be to stay off of the newsfeed on Facebook, but I'm doing it, and I feel good about how I am spending my work days.

Also, did you pre-order your Much Ado About You planner? You still have time to help save my favorite handmade business! Click here to pre-order now!

I'm not adding anything or taking anything away from your schedule today. No huge challenge. I am hoping that you'll continue in our search for intentional time until Sunday when we'll throw ourselves a little party for knowing what we're doing with our time.

Until then, all you need to do to stay in the race for our week long challenge is comment below about how you're feeling about giving up your time wasting activity. Has it been hard? Do you miss it? Are you getting more done with your time because you've given up your time waster? Just tell us how you're doing with that transition.

Can't wait to check-in tomorrow!

.....day 202 of a year of writing.....



12 comments:

  1. I missed a comment so I'm outta the race but still enjoying your blog. Addison much like her momma managed to make me cry! What a sweet lil angel you have! Hope today brings you less stress.

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  2. I agree Addison's comment made me tear up as well!! You are such an inspiration to so many people! You are your own worst critic!!

    Yes giving up the facebook newsfeed has been a bit of a struggle but I NEED to!! Discipline!!! The phone in the car not so much! I love having conversations with my 12 year old and 15 month old! (he doesn't have words but has a lot to say!) Thanks for the challenge!!

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  3. my time waster was hitting my snooze button and I'm going to admit, even after getting out of bed multiple times yesterday to hit that dang button, I still climbed back into bed. It was so much harder then I thought it would be! Today however was better, but still very hard. I stuck my clothes between my bed and my alarm clock so I would see them before crawling back into bed. That helped, but man I am not a morning person. I'm now going to try to go to bed earlier to see if that helps.

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  4. Ok, so day 1 with no cell phone games with successful. It was easier than I thought it would be considering how I rely on them to kill time. Killing time, I no longer like that phrase because it's wasteful. I've learned this through this exercise. Whenever, I have a spare time or time to kill...... progress in accomplishment takes its place. I am learning there are just so many more purpose-filled things to do. Love this! It's an eye opener for sure!

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  5. There have definitely been moments of just habit where I'll go to sit down and grab the remote and have had to make a conscience decision not to watch tv, but once I get over that initial moment, I seem to be just fine. I've been able to keep our house picked up better, laundry done, dishes done, more time for one on one time with my little one while big one is at school. Honestly, it's a bit nuts to me how that 1-2 hours adds up in a day. When I realize I can get 10 things done in the time I took to watch some stupid reality show, kind of puts things in perspective.

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  6. I am doing alright with giving up my time wasting activity... however, um, I think I have more than one time wasting activity. I unexpectedly spent a good hour on the phone with a friend this morning. And subsequently, my shower was pushed off, my kids watched more tv than I would have liked, the dishes didn't get done until my quiet time. I began to feel like a failure at this being intentional business. But, just as soon as that began, the small voice of the Holy Spirit reminded me that it is a process. That, I must cut myself some slack because He knows my heart and is helping me in my journey. I just pray that I'm always aware of His non-condemning overwhelmingly love-filled presence.

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  7. I haven't struggled as much as I thought I would with giving up the Facebook newsfeed, but I was busy getting Scentsy transition stuff done last night. Tonight might be harder. I'm utterly pooped from my 9-5 work day and just want to veg. I've already put a Stephen King book within reach to distract me. :)

    BTW, I'm Heather Magouyrk Pratt on facebook. I think I've been posting my comments in both places. LOL!

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  8. This week has been hard in many ways but giving up my phone in the car hasn't been as hard as expected...the conversations with my 4 year old have been well worth it! I'm embarrassed to admit it but my phone has taken time away from my little guy ...thanks for the challenge Allison! I have gained so much more than expected!...btw my little dog was found this morning. Unfortunately she had past away. Thanks again for the prayers this week in finding her. She is with our lord and my husbands grandmother who also past away this week. My challenge for each of you...hug and kiss those who mean so much to you! You never know whenthe lord will take them. XOXO

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  9. My time wasting activity was was my cellphone (needlessly checking Facebook, playing games, etc.), and my goal is to read a few Bible verses in place of those time wasters. It is certainly not easy, but I was so busy at work today that I really didn't have time to goof off. :) lol It was one of the most stressful days I've had in a while, but we had our bi-weekly women's Bible study tonight, and that made everything better!! :) We are starting a new Bible study project that will definitely help me to be more intentional with my time, and to spend more time in God's word. :)

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  10. I should have said "my goal is to read a few Bible verses every time I'm tempted to play games, needlessly check Facebook, etc. on my phone." :)

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  11. Ohhhh my..... This has been really hard!! Really convicting. And I don't know about you, but I don't especially like to be convicted!!! Thank you Ally for challenging us though! If I could, I would come over and give you a GREAT BIG HUG! You are being "His hands and feet." And no one said that would be easy!!! I love you sweet sister!
    Robin

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  12. Well, this has been hard, but I am doing it! The first night I just went to bed later, since I could not be on my phone, while in bed. Which I know was not the point, but I am feeling that not being on my cell phone surfing or on FB in bed, means I am getting more sleep. It is really hard. I catch myself reaching and I think nope I get on it here.

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